What does the Bible say makes a good husband?

Embodying love and leadership

By Shawn Buckles

The Bible highlights love, faithfulness, and humility as key traits of a good husband, blending personal virtues with spiritual duty in marriage.

The Bible highlights love, respect, and faithfulness as qualities of a good husband. Ephesians 5:25 instructs, "Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her." This verse emphasizes selfless love and sacrifice as the foundation of being a good husband.

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.
Ephesians 5:25
Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.
1 Peter 3:7
Let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.
Ephesians 5:33

Summary

  • Biblical teachings emphasize love, faithfulness, and humility as core qualities of a good husband.
  • Scriptural examples highlight that a good husband's role goes beyond personal qualities to include spiritual leadership in the home.
  • Love is presented as an action, with the Bible advocating for a husband's active demonstration of love and commitment within marriage.

Bible mentions a good husband in the following books:

  • The Five Love Languages (1992): Gary Chapman explores how understanding and speaking your partner's love language can foster a deeper, more fulfilling relationship, highlighting the importance of love and respect in marriage.

  • Love and Respect (2004): Emerson Eggerichs discusses the biblical command for husbands to love their wives and for wives to respect their husbands, offering insights into how fulfilling these needs can transform relationships.

  • Sacred Marriage (2000): Gary Thomas poses the question, "What if God designed marriage to make us holy more than to make us happy?" exploring how husbands can love their wives sacrificially and grow together spiritually.

  • The Man in the Mirror (1989): Patrick Morley addresses the challenges and pressures men face in their personal and professional lives, providing biblical solutions for becoming a husband who prioritizes his wife's emotional and spiritual well-being.

Biblical Foundation of Marriage

The Bible provides clear guidance on marriage, defining it as a covenant relationship and emphasizing love, respect, and mutual support. Here are key aspects from the Scriptures that shed light on what makes a good husband in the context of a godly marriage.

Genesis: The First Marriage

In the Book of Genesis, the concept of marriage is introduced with the creation of Adam and Eve.

Genesis 2:18 mentions God's intention for man not to be alone and his creation of a suitable helper for him. The term "helper" signifies support and partnership.

Genesis 2:24 establishes marriage as a union where two become "one flesh," highlighting the intimacy and unbreakable bond intended for marriage.

Christ's Teaching on Marriage

Christ reaffirms the importance of marriage throughout His teachings.

In Matthew 19:4-6, He quotes Genesis on the creation of man and woman and the call to be "one flesh," underlining the sanctity and permanence of marital union. Christ's teachings place love and faithfulness as the cornerstone of marriage.

Marital Roles Defined in Ephesians

Ephesians 5:22-33 outlines specific roles within marriage, calling husbands to love their wives as Christ loved the church and wives to respect their husbands.

It draws an analogy between the husband as the head and the wife as the body, indicating a relationship bonded by love and respect.

It's mentioned that the husband should love his wife as he loves himself, signifying the depth of care and commitment expected.

Characteristics of a Good Husband

In the framework of Christian marriage, the Bible delineates specific qualities that define a good husband. These characteristics are essential for fostering a strong, loving, and lasting relationship grounded in biblical principles.

Leading with Love

A good husband leads with love, following the example set forth in Ephesians 5:25, "Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her."

This sacrificial love is the cornerstone of his role within the marriage, indicating a commitment that goes beyond mere affection to encompass a deep, enduring dedication to his wife's well-being.

Honoring and Understanding

1 Peter 3:7 advises husbands to honor their wives and live with them in understanding, recognizing that they are equals in God's grace.

A good husband honors his wife's thoughts, feelings, and contributions and approaches her with respect, gentleness, and patience. This mutual honor is a critical component of a thriving marital relationship.

Living with Integrity

The Bible encourages husbands to embody integrity and live by the principles of righteousness.

Proverbs emphasizes the importance of wisdom and strength of character, while 1 Timothy 3:2 points out that a husband should be "above reproach... sober-minded, self-controlled, respectable."

Living with integrity means being faithful and showing self-control, not just in the context of marital fidelity, but also in daily interactions and personal conduct.

The Husband's Role in Spiritual Growth

The role of a husband in fostering spiritual growth is pivotal within a Christian marriage. He is often regarded as the spiritual leader, tasked with guiding his family closer to God through various acts of faith and devotion.

As the Spiritual Leader

A husband, as the spiritual leader, is called to embody the love and guidance of Christ for his family.

Ephesians 5:23 states, "For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior."

He is encouraged to not only uphold the teachings of the Bible but also to exhibit virtues of humility and selflessness. In doing so, he becomes a role model, inspiring spiritual growth within the household.

Prayer and Worship

At the heart of spiritual leadership is the commitment to prayer and worship.

A husband should lead his family in regular prayers, setting an example of dependence on God for strength and wisdom.

James 5:16 underscores the value of prayer: "Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working."

His active engagement in church life also plays a crucial role in fostering a united spiritual journey.

Dealing with Temptation

Confronting and overcoming temptation is an ongoing challenge in a Christian's life.

A husband must seek the Lord for guidance and harness the wisdom offered by the Scriptures, like in 1 Corinthians 10:13, which assures, "No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability..."

By turning to prayer and upholding biblical principles, he can navigate these temptations and provide a haven of integrity for his family.

Practical Love in Action

Practical love, as the Bible describes, involves actions that exemplify love in tangible ways. In the context of marriage, this is reflected through a husband's commitment to providing for, being faithful to, and effectively communicating with his spouse.

Providing and Protecting

According to 1 Timothy 5:8, a husband is expected to provide for his family.

Failure to do so is described as denying the faith and being worse than an unbeliever. This provision extends beyond mere financial support, encompassing physical safety, emotional security, and spiritual leadership.

A husband who loves his wife as himself, as noted in Ephesians 5:28, actively works to ensure that she is cared for and protected.

Faithfulness in Marriage

Faithfulness in marriage is emphasized throughout scripture.

The calls to rejoice with the wife of one's youth (Proverbs 5:18-19) and to recognize the wife as a good thing and a favor from the Lord (Proverbs 19%3A14) underscore fidelity's value.

Moreover, Hebrews 13:4 honors the marriage bed by declaring it pure and warning against adulterous behavior, which taints love's true nature.

Communication and Conflict Resolution

Effective communication and conflict resolution are key to practicing love in marriage.

The Bible encourages patience and trust, guiding husbands to be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry (James 1%3A19).

In matters of conflict, they are to resolve issues with gentleness, echoing 1 Corinthians 13 which speaks of love not being easily angered but rather bearing, believing, hoping, and enduring all things.

Matthew 5:32 further warns against the consequences of divorce due to marital unfaithfulness, heightening the importance of resolving conflicts rather than allowing them to fester.

The Husband's Relationship to the Family

In the family structure, a husband plays a pivotal role that encompasses both leadership and nurture. Biblical scriptures suggest that a husband's conduct can profoundly impact the household's spiritual and relational dynamics.

Leading by Example

A good husband is often viewed as the family's anchor, providing a model for behavior and character.

Proverbs 12:4 acknowledges the strength that comes from a virtuous partner: "A wife of noble character is her husband's crown, but a disgraceful wife is like decay in his bones."

As such, husbands should strive to exhibit righteousness and wisdom in their actions, acknowledging their mistakes and leading their family with integrity.

Discipline and Instruction

Ephesians 6:4 offers direct guidance to fathers: "Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord."

This verse highlights the balance needed in a father's role — to discipline with a gentle hand and guide with loving instruction. The goal is to create a household where children feel valued and are taught the principles of faith and righteousness.

Love and Intimacy in Marriage

In the context of a Christian marriage, the Bible places great emphasis on the role of love and intimacy between a husband and wife. These elements are foundational in building a strong, God-centered union.

Cultivating Emotional Intimacy

The Bible underscores the importance of a husband and wife becoming one flesh, a profound unity that goes beyond physical connection (Genesis 2:24).

For a husband, understanding his wife's emotional needs is paramount.

Ephesians 5:33 advises, "Each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband."

This mutual respect and affection foster emotional intimacy, which is essential for a thriving relationship.

Physical Intimacy and Affection

Scripture celebrates physical love within marriage, highlighting it as a source of joy and a critical facet of the marital bond.

Proverbs 5:18-19 likens this connection to a refreshing fountain and encourages husbands to find delight in their wife's breasts.

Sexual relations, then, are not just a marital right but a shared joy—a good thing found in the loving and exclusive relationship between husband and wife.

Proverbs 18:22 suggests, "He who finds a wife finds a good thing," indicating that marital intimacy is a blessing to be cherished.

Marriage Challenges and Overcoming Together

Marriage is a journey that often entails navigating through various hardships and external pressures. This section will explore how couples can face trials, understand the impact of outside influences, and grow through forgiveness.

Facing Trials and Adversity

Couples may encounter numerous trials that test the strength and endurance of their relationship.

The Bible offers guidance on this, as seen in 1 Peter 4:8-10, advising couples to maintain a deep love for each other because love covers a multitude of sins.

  • Trust: Essential in overcoming these trials
  • Strength & Courage: Need to be fostered continuously

The Impact of External Influences

External influences can often strain a marriage. Pressures from relatives or cultural expectations are common examples.

Proverbs 31:10-11 emphasizes the value of a capable wife. Her husband can trust her, negating harmful effects from outside their union.

It's important for them to present a united front. This will shield their marriage against temptations and evil that could destroy their bond.

  • Unbeliever: Challenges when married to an unbeliever (1 Corinthians 7:12-14)
  • Wisdom: Discerning good counsel from bad (Romans 12:2)

Growth and Forgiveness in Marriage

Finally, personal growth and forgiveness are key in a thriving marriage. Genesis 2:24 speaks to the unity of marriage, which involves growing together as one flesh.

A verse from Proverbs 17:9 illustrates that whoever seeks love covers an offense. This suggests that forgiveness is a necessary step in fostering trust and love.

It also suggests that couples should strive for continual improvement. This is the foundation for a lasting relationship.

  • Temptation: Recognizing and overcoming together
  • Divorce: It's often cited as a solution but can sometimes be prevented through mutual growth and forgiveness (1 Corinthians 7:10-11)

Conclusion

The Bible provides a clear vision of what it means to be a good husband. It emphasizes that a good husband should embody Christ-like love for his wife, prioritizing her well-being and sanctification.

This type of love is selfless and sacrificial, mirroring the commitment and devotion shown by Christ to the church.

In marriage, the Bible underscores mutual respect and cherishing one another. A good husband acknowledges his wife as a precious gift from the Lord, understanding the significance of his role in fostering a nurturing and loving environment.

He is called to be a leader in the home, guiding with compassion and integrity.

Key verses highlight these qualities, such as Ephesians 5:25 and Proverbs 18:22, demonstrating the importance placed on love and recognizing the value of a supportive spouse.

The marital bond is strengthened through these principles, creating a foundation that honors God's design for marriage.

End of content

No more pages to load