What does the Bhagavad Gita say about friendship?

Guidance towards spiritual kinship

By Shawn Buckles

Explore the Bhagavad Gita's take on friendship as more than a bond but a path to spiritual growth. See how Krishna's guidance to Arjuna offers lessons on deep connections today.

The Bhagavad Gita highlights the importance of friendship through the relationship between Krishna and Arjuna, illustrating that a true friend acts as a guide and mentor, offering support and wisdom. It suggests that spiritual friendship is based on mutual respect, trust, and a shared journey towards enlightenment.

One who is equal to friends and enemies, who is equipoised in honor and dishonor, heat and cold, happiness and distress, fame and infamy, who is always free from contaminating association, always silent and satisfied with anything, who doesn't care for any residence, who is fixed in knowledge and engaged in devotional service, is very dear to Me.
The Supreme Personality of Godhead said: My dear Arjuna, how have these impurities come upon you? They are not at all befitting a man who knows the value of life. They lead not to higher planets, but to infamy.
I am the Self, O Gudakesha, seated in the hearts of all creatures. I am the beginning, the middle and the end of all beings.

Summary

  • The Bhagavad Gita provides a profound exploration of friendship, especially through Krishna's guidance to Arjuna.
  • True friendship according to the Gita involves spiritual growth, ethical conduct, and mutual respect.
  • The principles of friendship from the Gita are applicable to contemporary relationships, focusing on guidance and support.

The Bhagavad Gita mentions friendship in the following books:

  • The Bhagavad Gita (circa 2nd century BCE): Illustrates the profound friendship between Krishna and Arjuna, emphasizing guidance, loyalty, and spiritual enlightenment within the bonds of friendship.

  • The Four Loves (1960) by C.S. Lewis: Explores the nature of love from a Christian perspective, including affection, friendship, eros, and charity, offering deep insights into how friendships can elevate and transform us.

  • Spiritual Friendship (2015) by Mindy Caliguire: Drawing on historical texts and personal insight, this book revisits the concept of spiritual friendship as a vital and often overlooked aspect of spiritual growth.

  • Friendship: The Art of Happiness (2001) by John Armstrong: Philosophically examines the role of friendship in achieving a happy life, touching on themes similar to those in the Gita about mutual support and the journey toward a fulfilled life.

  • Swami Vivekananda on Yoga (1999) by Swami Vivekananda: Though not exclusively about friendship, Vivekananda's teachings include the importance of spiritual companionship and mentorship, echoing the guidance Krishna offers to Arjuna.

Historical Context of the Bhagavad Gita

The Bhagavad Gita is a profound spiritual text that imparts wisdom about duty, righteousness, and life's deeper purpose within an epic battlefield setting. Its timeless dialogue between Arjuna and Krishna weaves together philosophy, ethics, and duty, resonating across centuries.

Setting of the Gita in the Mahabharata

The Mahabharata is a Sanskrit epic recounting the history of the Pandavas and Kauravas, two groups of cousins who vie for the throne of Hastinapura. The Bhagavad Gita, a small but significant part of this epic, unfolds on the sacred plains of Kurukshetra, where these families are drawn into a catastrophic war. Before the battle begins, Arjuna, a Pandava prince, is filled with moral dilemma and despair about fighting his own kith and kin.

The Relationship between Arjuna and Krishna

In the midst of turmoil, Arjuna's charioteer reveals himself to be Lord Krishna, an incarnation of the divine. Their conversation, at the heart of the Gita, delves into profound philosophical and ethical discussions. Krishna's counsel to Arjuna extends beyond the scope of friendship, providing guidance on living a life of virtue and fulfilling one's duties with detachment and dedication. This dialogue encapsulates friendship's spiritual dimension, portraying Krishna as both a divine guide and a supportive friend to Arjuna.

The Nature of True Friendship

The Bhagavad Gita provides profound insights on the aspects of friendship through the interactions between Krishna and Arjuna. Their relationship demonstrates how friendship transcends the ordinary and becomes a channel for divine wisdom.

Krishna's Teachings on Friendship

Krishna emphasizes that true friendship is devoid of selfish motives. In the epic tale, he guides Arjuna through a state of confusion by imparting knowledge and displaying unwavering support. This illuminates the Gita's perspective that a genuine friend acts as a guiding light, leading one towards the right path and truth. Krishna's role as a charioteer to Arjuna, especially during the great battle of Kurukshetra, symbolizes this sacred bond. They embody the idea that a venerable friend is essential to discovering one's strength and overcoming life's challenges.

Significance of Friendship in the Gita

In the Gita, friendship is more than an emotional connection; it is a spiritual kinship that fosters moral and ethical development. The foundation of friendship between Krishna and Arjuna represents a deep affection coupled with a sense of duty that leads to the ultimate good. Their relationship is a testament to the power of friendship to navigate complex moral dilemmas. The text highlights the virtues of equanimity, impartiality, and compassion as key elements of a meaningful friendship, guiding individuals towards spiritual upliftment and fulfillment.

Krishna and Arjuna: The Paradigm of Divine Friendship

In the Bhagavad Gita, the relationship between Krishna and Arjuna exemplifies the highest form of friendship. It combines the deep bonds of a sympathetic friend with the reverence due to a divine guide.

Arjuna as the Pandava Prince and Friend

Arjuna, the Pandava prince, represents the ideal friend who seeks wisdom and guidance in the face of moral dilemmas. His questions to Krishna about duty and righteousness reflect the concerns of an individual striving for ethical clarity. Arjuna's genuine friendship with Krishna sets the stage for the profound dialogue that forms the heart of the Bhagavad Gita.

Krishna as the Supreme Lord and Guide

Krishna, while a dear friend to Arjuna, is also unveiled as the Supreme Lord offering guidance. He steers Arjuna through his spiritual and moral quandaries by imparting sacred wisdom. This unique relationship highlights Krishna's role both as a personal friend and a divine guide, illuminating the path not just for Arjuna, but for all humanity seeking guidance amidst the battles of life.

Philosophical and Spiritual Lessons on Friendship

The Bhagavad Gita offers profound insights into the nature of friendship through a philosophical and spiritual lens. It underscores the balance between attachment and detachment, and highlights how dharma—righteous duty—shapes friendships.

The Concept of Detachment and Attachment

In the realm of friendship, the Bhagavad Gita teaches the importance of detachment. While friends share deep bonds, true spiritual friendship involves a lack of possessiveness or attachment to outcomes. The Gita suggests that one should love and support friends but remain detached in the sense of not being overwhelmed by expectations or emotions. Such a balanced approach allows individuals to offer genuine support without being swayed by attachment, which aligns with the teachings on friendship, karma, and life.

Understanding Dharma and Righteous Actions

Friendship in the Bhagavad Gita is also tied to the concept of dharma. One's duty, or dharma, in a friendship is to act righteously and encourage the same in their friends. The Gita emphasizes that actions within a friendship should uphold moral values and strive towards the spiritual growth of all involved. Thus, the guidance provided by Krishna to Arjuna serves as a prime example of steering a friend towards righteous action during the challenges faced in the epic Mahabharata.

Applying the Gita's Wisdom to Modern Relationships

The timeless wisdom of the Bhagavad Gita provides potent insights into forging and nurturing friendships that promote personal growth and bolster society. Its teachings can inform and transform modern interpersonal dynamics.

Role of Friendship in Personal Growth

Friendship is a catalyst for personal growth in the modern world. The Gita emphasizes the value of a friend who acts as a mirror, reflecting one’s true self, thereby facilitating self-awareness and evolution. Such friendships foster growth as they encourage individuals to act with righteousness and pursue their dharma (inherent duty), an essential aspect that the Bhagavad Gita highlights for sustaining a balanced life. When friends support each other’s aspirations and provide honest feedback, they can overcome personal obstacles and thrive.

Influence of Friendship on Society

The Gita suggests that friendship wields considerable influence on society. Friends who uphold each other's virtues contribute to the moral fabric of a community. By promoting principles of mutual respect and unity, as advised in the teachings of Lord Krishna on building strong relationships, friendships can transcend personal benefit and serve the greater good. This ripple effect can transform societal values over time, emphasizing the collective over the individual and the spiritual over the materialistic.

Yogic Principles and Friendship

The Bhagavad Gita offers profound insight into how yogic principles apply to friendship, emphasizing that a clear and calm mind, born from regular meditation and yoga practice, is essential to nurturing meaningful relationships.

The Interplay of Yoga and Interpersonal Bonds

In the realm of yoga, the practice is not just a solitary pursuit but also a means to enhance interpersonal bonds. The Bhagavad Gita reminds us that a true friend embodies the spirit of yoga through their actions and intentions. An example of this is the deep bond between Arjuna and Krishna, illustrating the connection between yogic principles and friendship. Their relationship, steeped in spiritual brotherhood, is symbolic of the kind of friendship that transcends the mere transactional nature of give-and-take and instead is rooted in mutual growth and understanding. They highlight that fostering friendship requires one to be supportive without attachment and guide others towards spiritual wisdom.

Maintaining Equanimity Amidst Relationships

One of the cornerstones of yogic philosophy as taught in the Bhagavad Gita is equanimity—maintaining mental composure and evenness of temper, especially in difficult circumstances. When applied to friendship, this principle encourages individuals to remain balanced and unbiased in their emotional responses. Relationships, fraught with ebbs and flows, require the stability of equanimity to thrive. Meditation and yoga serve as tools to master one's mind, ensuring that one's friendship is not shaken by extremes of emotion and that mutual respect is maintained, reflecting the essence of the spiritual teachings of the Bhagavad Gita.

Ethical and Moral Dimensions of Friendship in the Gita

The Bhagavad Gita addresses friendship through a lens that balances righteousness and compassion, while also cautioning against the impairments caused by ego and desire.

In its discourse on ethical and moral conduct, the Gita puts significant emphasis on dharma (righteousness) and its role in shaping friendships. Dharma here refers to the moral virtue of acting in accordance with one's duties and principles. One's actions towards friends should be guided by a commitment to these duties, ensuring the righteousness of relationships. Furthermore, the Gita speaks to the importance of compassion in friendships. The text promotes the idea that sincere compassion towards a friend reflects a deep understanding of one's moral responsibilities and is essential for the maintenance of a harmonious social order.

The Impact of Ego and Desire on Friendships

According to the Gita, friendships can be detrimentally impacted by ego and desire. The text cautions that the presence of a strong ego can lead to pride and possessiveness, which distort the purity of friendship. When one's actions in a friendship are driven by personal desire rather than mutual well-being, it can lead to attachment, which the Gita considers an obstacle to spiritual progress. For friendships to flourish in an ethical and moral way, the Gita suggests that individuals should perform actions selflessly (Nishkama Karma), which is the practice of desireless action for the welfare of others.

The Broader Influence of the Gita on Friendships

The Bhagavad Gita has permeated various aspects of life, extending its wisdom to the concept of friendship. It not only informs individual relationships but also enriches broader philosophical and religious thought.

Contribution to Hindu Philosophy and Religion

The Bhagavad Gita has a profound influence on Hindu philosophy and religion. It teaches that true friendship transcends the physical realm, emphasizing a bond that is spiritual and eternal. The Gita illustrates this through the relationship between Krishna and Arjuna, where Krishna imparts knowledge and guidance, leading Arjuna out of his doubts and presenting a path rooted in righteousness and deeper connection. This narrative has shaped the understanding of friendship in Hinduism, portraying it as a divine construct that mirrors the selfless love and support shown by the gods.

The Gita's Resonance with Global Thinkers

The universal messages from the Bhagavad Gita about friendship have resonated with global thinkers across cultures. Mahatma Gandhi, for instance, drew inspiration from the Gita for his principles of non-violence and camaraderie. Similarly, American transcendentalist Henry David Thoreau found the Gita's insights to be uplifting and echoing his values of simplicity and introspection. Both figures exemplify how the text's exploration of friendship has reached beyond its religious origins, inspiring and guiding individuals in their personal and social lives.

Conclusion

The Bhagavad Gita addresses friendship as a profound dialogue between Arjuna and Krishna. They embody the ideal of dharma, or righteous duty, within their relationship. The text elucidates the complexities of karma and life, advising about pursuing actions without attachment to outcomes.

In essence, the Gita upholds the value of equanimity in relationships. It teaches that one should view friends and foes with impartiality. True spiritual progress is evident when one can maintain a balanced intellect among all, including both well-wishers and adversaries. This principle extends to everyday life, promoting harmony and understanding in human connections.

The lessons from the Bhagavad Gita provide an enduring framework for navigating friendships with wisdom. They offer guidance on developing compassion, detachment, and fairness—qualities essential for sustaining meaningful bonds in life.

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